The WORST Parts of Pregnancy

Today I want to share the WORST parts of pregnancy. Sometimes you just want to feel like “yeah, this really sucks” and be validated. I recently asked on my Facebook group what the WORST parts of pregnancy were for people, and I pulled out some of the top answers.

We’ve got quite a few — and for most of them I have some good information, so let’s get started!

Pregnancy is definitely a two-edged sword. You may very much want to be pregnant, and have a baby but when you ARE pregnant you can realize it’s absolutely miserable. All of those feelings are valid and you can still love your baby and hate being pregnant. There is room for all those emotions here.

Acid Reflux or Heartburn

I saw this one a LOT. Heartburn is very normal in pregnancy but doesn’t mean it’s fun.

I actually don’t have a post on this one (although I should).

The only bit of advice is that there are medications you can take beyond Tums — so talk with your provider to see what could work for you!

Sorry guys, talking about what meds you should take is beyond my paygrade. 🙂

Pelvic Pain

Ugh, I feel you on this one. I had it so bad (worse on each progressive pregnancy). I have a LOT about pelvic pain that might be able to help you out:

• Diastasis Symphysis Pubis During Pregnancy
• 5 Fixes for Groin Pain During Pregnancy
• 6 Easy Ways to Get Relief from Hip Pain During Pregnancy
• Pain Between Your Legs During Pregnancy
• 38 Weeks With Pelvic Pain & I Can’t Walk — HELP!

Cramps/Braxton Hicks

YES! Your uterus will start to contract now and then throughout your pregnancy. Some people call them “practice” contractions, but they sure don’t feel like a practice — they feel like the REAL THING!

I will say that some people think that ligament pain is contractions — but they’re different, so I’d read that article to see what you can do about the ligament pain.

But, beyond that the best thing to keep Braxton Hicks at bay is to make sure that you’re drinking enough water. I’d also recommend to make sure that you don’t have a bladder infection as that can often trigger Braxton Hicks.

I have a few articles you might find helpful on this one too:

• Contractions vs Braxton Hicks Quiz
• Signs of Labor
• True Labor Contractions: The signs of real labor
• When Will I Go Into Labor Quiz
• What does a contraction feel like?

Waiting for Pregnancy Test Results

I got nothing for you here. I wish you could by patience at Costco because I need it bulk packaging.

The main thing is that you’re not alone. I have so many people anxious about their pregnancy tests — and the only thing I can tell you is to wait a day or two.

Try to distract yourself. That’s my only thing. Have you watched Bridgerton? Or maybe Call the Midwife? That one’s my favorite. 🙂

Here are a few posts you might find helpful though:

• Early Pregnancy Symptoms You Might Be Missing
• The MOST accurate — am I pregnant quiz!
• Pregnancy Calendar by Week: Your calculator to your pregnancy progress

BTW if you’re early in pregnancy I think this pregnancy planner can be SO helpful (honestly, even if you’re later on too):

GDM (Gestational Diabetes)

Diabetes — both taking the test and actually having it are a real concern for a lot of people.

While I don’t have any information if you have diabetes. I will say that I did the diabetic diet for the majority of my last pregnancy and nothing tastes better than that chocolate cake once baby is out. Just do your best while baby is in…. hugs to you my friend, it’s hard to feel so miserable and have diet restrictions too.

BUT if it’s taking the test, I do have some tips for that:

• The Pregnancy Glucose Test for Gestational Diabetes
• You Failed Your 1-hour Glucose Test – What’s Next?
• Avoid Failing the Glucose Test During Pregnancy
• What to Eat Before Your Pregnancy Glucose Test
• Signs You Passed Your Glucose Screening Test During Pregnancy

Postpartum

Man oh man, this one is my mission to help change. There is SO much (especially in the US, where I live) that we could do better.

The biggest thing I can tell you (if you’re still pregnant) is to prepare for postpartum.

I do have a postpartum plan that is SO smart to get started on:

Personally, I took a prenatal class that just acted like it would be sunshine and rainbows after my baby was born. When it wasn’t, and I was in so much pain I just thought I was the only one.

I’m here to say that isn’t true, and there is a lot you can do to make it better.

When I created my own birth class I created two full chapters on life postpartum. One for getting what you need from the hospital (this is a KEY) and then also life after you go home. I’m very realistic about what to expect, and things you can do to make it better.

I love what Julia S had to say about the class:

“This class is wonderful! The information Hillary shared really helped us feel more prepared and validated our current understanding of childbirth and postpartum care. I especially loved the message of hope at the end and to enjoy your baby.”

I really do think preparation is key for postpartum life. I also think my post on postpartum self-care can be really helpful too!

Back Pain

YES! I hate how this one is mostly physics (although some early labor cramping can be back pain too).

As your belly grows, your back has to shift how it normally does things so you can stand up. Which results in strain in your lower back.

I totally recommend some yoga (because your thigh muscles also get into this and stretching your whole body will help a lot).

I have a few other articles that might help too:

• Period Pains and Backache On and Off at 36 Weeks of Pregnancy — Is it Labor?
• What Does Round Ligament Pain Feel Like
• Pain Under Your Bra Line During Pregnancy

Restless Leg

I had quite a few people mention this one on my survey.

I do have a post on using soap for it (seriously, the comments are crazy on that post because it makes NO sense to me).

If this is your issue I’d ask your provider what they think about adding some magnesium supplementation and see what they say. I’ve heard some people helped a LOT with that.

Anxiety

Girl, I feel you.

SO much anxiety about previous losses.

BTW, I’d 100% recommend this podcast episode with my friend Winter:

Anxiety around things like issues on ultrasounds (a few mentioned sub chorionic hematomas) — so many people just carry anxiety with them during their pregnancy.

I think that we always think: “If I can just get to XYZ I will feel better” — but then, somehow we don’t feel better (if you do feel better though, that’s awesome).

The reality is that parenting includes a lot of anxiety, at least it has for me.

Letting go of this myth has helped a lot.

I have also turned a lot towards positive affirmations, and trying to give my brain the signal that things could also work out VERY well.

Truth Bomb from Hilary: I just want to say that I am a naturally anxious person. I ended up with postpartum anxiety and didn’t have a clue what it was. I wish I’d gotten treatment for it. I had so much anxiety I never ended-up enjoying my newborns as much as I wish I had. I think drugs would’ve helped a lot.

However, I have gone to therapy, I work on gratitude and thinking positive. I have to work on it every day. I’m naturally a very glass half empty (frankly, it’s almost gone you guys) — and I think I will struggle with this until I die. But it’s something I’m currently thriving with. 🙂

Waiting for Baby to be Born

GAH, this is SO HARD! It’s only made worse by other friends having their baby before you — the nerve!

I have a few posts that might help with this:

• To the Mom Who Thinks She’ll Go Early.
• 40 weeks + a day and No Sign of Labor?

I will also say that on my last baby I went 12 days over my due date. I get this. It’s hard. I wish I’d had more frozen yogurt. 🙂

I will say while you’re waiting you can pack your hospital bag:

AND you can make your birth plan with me:

Morning Sickness/All-day Sickness

Oh man I saw this one SO much.

I have one VERY big thought on this:

There are things you can do to help. If your provider just says it’s “normal” but it’s affecting your day to day living say that.

They should be trying things.

At the very least if you’re not holding down fluids they should offer an IV to get you re-hydrated. I can’t tell you how much better you’ll feel hydrated.

That isn’t to say that they can solve this issue — but they should be trying things and taking it seriously.

It’s miserable, and the only good news is that it doesn’t last forever — it just seems like it will!

I do have a post on if lollipops help….

Not Feeling Movement

So much of this depends on how far along you are. Most people feel movement by 20 weeks (but you’ll hear of people feeling it much earlier). The reality is that only you know when you’re feeling baby move and it’s not very reassuring when you’re not feeling them move.

I have a few articles on this:

• Normal Daily Fetal Movement – Kick Counts
• Should You Buy Your Own Fetal Doppler?
• 30 weeks Pregnant and Baby’s Movements Have Slowed Down
• Increased Baby Movements Before Labor
• Feel Baby Move in Lower Abdomen: 20 Weeks Pregnant

If you’re further along, I’d 100% recommend kick counts too:

Sciatica

This is a nerve pain that goes down below your butt and can be MISERABLE.

Much if it follows the same things as the hip pain section — and a lot of people find some light heat helps. Talk with your provider to see if there’s anything they can recommend or if they think physical therapy can help.

Here are a few tips about heat:

• Can You Use a Microwave Heat Pack While Pregnant
• Using a Heating Pad While Pregnant: Can you use it on your stomach?

I think people are afraid of heat (and in some cases that is valid — but not when it’s your hips/butt that hurts). So be sure to figure out how to use it safely.

Delivery of the Baby

The deliver of the baby is often what people think is the worst. Which makes me sad.

Yes, it’s likely to be hard and a story you will tell for years to come (it sure should be — that baby deserves to know you walked to hell and back for them before you even met them!)

However, taking a birth class has proven to make birth better. The Online Prenatal Class for Couples is really the easy way to get prepared. I can’t recommend it any more.

• It can be done on your own timeline — 24/7 it’s available in short “birth bites” so you’re not overwhelmed.
• It is meant to be done with your partner to turn them into a teammate vs just a cheerleader.
• Learn how to make choices that suit you for pregnancy, labor, birth and beyond.

I don’t want you feeling “pushed” into things, or miserable about what’s going on — and I’ll teach you how to avoid all of that!

Fighting with Providers About Your Wishes

I saw this one a few times — and I see it ALL the time in my comments.

Let me state a fact right now:

Every. single. choice with your birth is up to you.

Ok, there are some rare cases to quickly preserve life we do some pretty amazing things, but in 99.9% of scenarios the choice is yours.

In The Online Prenatal Class for Couples I teach you how to take that power back. To get the information you need and be clear with everyone that you’re in charge. I think you’ll love it and you won’t have regrets as you look back. No one needs that!

Can’t Breathe

Did you know that your baby pushes up on your diaphragm making it so you literally don’t have as much lung space to get your breathe in.

To compensate your body expands your ribs a bit to let more air in. But seriously guys — it’s crazy town what we have to go through!

What I’m saying is that you aren’t fooling yourself when something that used to be easy now leaves you out of breath. It’s that baby.

HOWEVER if you’re out of breathe at rest — that isn’t something I’d keep quiet about. It’s a warning sign both during pregnancy & after birth that you need to be alert to.

I actually go over those signs in my Postpartum Care Made Easy Class (the written power point is free — but the video is included in The Online Prenatal Class for Couples as a bonus) — those warning signs are SO important an EASY to know and share with family.

ALL of it!

I heard this a couple of times, and it’s so valid.

Pregnancy can feel REALLY miserable.

It can feel unfair that you have to do all the things while your partner’s life is fairly unchanged.

It can feel like your doctors aren’t listening to you or helping — and it often takes effort to say that’s not OK and to try to get help.

It can feel like a losing battle as you hear people’s stories online.

I am here to say that you can take back that power.

• You can talk with your partner about what you’re feeling and wishes after birth so you’re shouldering it together (I have a whole workbook to talk about that)
• You can talk with your providers about what you need so they actually address your issues rather than brush you off.
• There really are SO many positive birth stories out there — staying positive can help a lot!
  • Having a Confident Delivery with Amber Breeding
  • Preparing for an Unexpected Cesarean with Katy
  • Getting Your Confident Birth with StormyFires
  • Creating Your Confident Birth with Alejandra

Come join me in The Online Prenatal Class for Couples where we really aim to make pregnancy, labor, birth and life postpartum so much easier so it’s not the worst anymore. You can actually enjoy it!