Lies I Used to Believe about Labor & Birth

You know, I wasn’t always a labor nurse, and I definitely wasn’t a labor nurse who read all the studies and was really informed on what the data really shows. I was also sort of caught-up in my own little bubble (as we all are). Today I want to share a few of the lies that I used to believe about labor, what changed my mind and how I moved forward.

I gotta know in the comments — which one of these do YOU believe and did I change your mind? — tell me at the bottom!

While we’re here, no decision is right for every pregnant family, so be sure to talk with your provider about what is best for you — this is just a good, general read that hopefully informs you a bit more on your options!

Elective Inductions are Bad

Man oh man did I believe this one. I just felt like we pushed mother nature into something she wasn’t up for. But, I changed my mind after I read the ARRIVE trial. It’s a study that compared people who were electively induced at 39 weeks vs those who were not. It showed outcomes for babies were similar, with a slightly lower cesarean rate.

Now, some providers seem to have done a 180 shift and are recommending all pregnant women get induced at 39 weeks — and I definitely haven’t gone that far.

But I do feel like, if a pregnant patient wants to be induced at 39 weeks, they should be able to.

And yes, that means even if there is no “medical” reason.

I feel like often we act like “medical” reasons are the only ones that are valid. And frankly — there’s a lot of good reasons:

• Partner can only be there on a specific day
• Mom/help can only come at a specific time frame
• They just want to plan it (the anxiety of “birth at any time” is real)
• People are uncomfortable

And those are just a few. I just don’t think it’s the medical establishment’s job to decide what’s best for people, as long as they’re choosing something that is safe.

That being said — if you’re going in for an induction, you definitely need to know what to expect. A lot of people think an induction is “the answer” and are surprised by how long and hard it is — so be sure to go through this induction checklist with your provider:

And, if you’re a person who really feels like people shouldn’t be able to choose to be induced, I’d ask you to re-think that statement. Overall, it’s been proven safe and people should be able to choose. The just shouldn’t be forced to do it. Those are two very different things.

One of the biggest lessons I learned is that the choices made during labor matter just as much as what happens before it starts. Things like elective inductions aren’t simply yes-or-no decisions—they come with timing, trade-offs, and options that can change how labor unfolds. That’s why I created The Online Prenatal Class for Couples: to help you and your partner understand common interventions, ask better questions in the moment, and make decisions together with confidence instead of fear.

Oxytocin and Pitocin are the Same

So, I had to take a lot of chemistry to be a nurse (in fact, I got to take biochem twice because I wanted to be so great at). And in terms of chemistry Oxytocin (what’s made by our body) and Pitocin are exactly the same. Yes, there’s something in the Pitocin vial that allows it to be shelf-stable, but the actual active hormone is exactly the same.

I also knew that our receptors on organs in our body can’t tell the difference between the hormone made by our body vs synthetic ones. This is why insulin works so well!

So, I always figured that they acted the same in the body.

But the big difference is that Oxytocin is made in our brain, and is allowed to bathe your brain this feel-good hormone. Oxytocin is the love hormone — and we feel it when we’re falling in love, or just feeling good around other humans. You know that feeling, and we all love it.

It is also the hormone that starts labor (kind of a mean trick, right?).

Pitocin, is given IV and is not allowed to the brain (our body has a protection mechanism called the blood-brain barrier that keeps specific things out of our spinal fluid and going to the brain to protect us). BUT since the Oxytocin is already THERE in the brain it is allowed there.

So you do miss some of those feel-good hormones. However, once labor really gets going, I’m not sure how much of that is present. That’s something I wondered with my own induction.

Beyond that, we pump Pitocin in via IV and it does get ramped up much quicker than regular Oxytocin in our bodies. But, that’s what an induction is — it’s us forcing our bodies to go into labor, and it makes sense that it will happen faster than “natural” labor. But, something important for you to know as well.

Fun fact: During an induction you can still control the Pitocin drip. If it’s going up too quickly or you’re overwhelmed by your contractions you can tell them not to increase it. That being said — if you aren’t allowing them to actually start contractions that help your body go into active labor, maybe you don’t actually want to be induced. So, it’s a balance. Learn more in my post on Pitocin inductions.

Want more information on inductions? Checkout these posts:

• Signs You’re Ready to Be Induced
• Pumping To Induce Labor? Will it work?
• 5 Things NOT to do Before Your Induction
• Inducing Labor at 39 Weeks: Pros and Cons
• 5 Reasons to NOT Get Induced

The Epidural Causes Back Pain

I’d heard this for so long as a new mom and from friends (and oddly, from a lot of men — but that’s a story for another day) so I figured it was true — that the epidural causes long-term back pain.

And is is true that there can be some bruising and pain at the epidural insertion point for a few weeks after birth. The same will be true for your IV site — just because we’ve punctured that area and irritated it running in fluids, etc.

However, studies show that those who got an epidural don’t have any more long-term back pain then those who did not.

I think the epidural gets a lot of the blame for all the back pain caused by:

• Pregnancy (SO hard on our backs to have our center of balanced changed by our protruding belly)
• Labor (and all the crazy positions we get in as we’re in pain)
• Birth
• Postpartum/Life with baby — which includes
  • Positions we sit in to nurse (not a good habit to get into — but easy to do)
  • Carrying the car seat (the worse)
  • Bending over to put baby in the crib, etc
  • Carrying baby (possibly bad front pack carriers too — I had a bad one)

Don’t believe me? I have a whole article with the studies linked about long-term back pain from the epidural.

Now, I don’t believe the epidural is for all patients, and there are definitely risks but I think there are some people out there who really push their own agenda on something like this. It’s important to be aware of it! Want more information on the epidural be sure to check out my guide to epidurals during labor.

Many epidural myths—like the idea that they cause long-term back pain—are repeated so often they start to feel true. For busy couples, trying to sort through conflicting advice can add unnecessary stress. My Online Prenatal Class for Couples focuses on clear, evidence-based explanations and real clinical experience, so you and your partner can feel prepared, calmer, and confident in your choices—without spending hours researching on your own.

Want to know more about pain management in labor? — check out these posts:

• Why People Get An Epidural Even When They’re Not Planning On It
• Why Labor Pain Can Feel So Different For Each Person
• 5 Simple Tips for a “Natural” Labor & Delivery
• 4 Things to Know About Birth Pains
• Is an Induction More Painful than “Regular Labor”

We Don’t Need National Maternity Leave

Confession that I am not proud of: I did not get maternity leave on my first pregnancy, and that really made me feel like no one else should get leave either. It was really tough heading back to work 5 weeks postpartum thinking my uterus was going to fall out on the nursing home floor I worked at (🤢🤢🤢).

Not only was it really hard to leave my baby, my body was entirely NOT ready either (I had a pretty big tear). I carried a lot of pain from that — but somehow in my mind I thought it made me a better mom (coping strategy).

On my other two kids I subsequently got a 6 week leave, and then a 12 week leave (which I split up). And frankly, SO much easier. Sure, recovery from having a baby still wasn’t my favorite, but not having to count every penny was nice.

(BTW, I used California state disability on my 2nd two children — and I believe that states may have to be our answer on this one).

After being in the social media birth sphere for a bit I realized my own bias that because I didn’t have something I felt like no one else should either. That it wasn’t necesary.

But I was wrong. I checked my own biases and I am now a strong proponent of paid maternity leave, and I try to voice my opinion as often and as loudly as I can. I’m embarrassed I ever really felt the other way, but we all are just who we are, and I am grateful we can change our minds. As shown by a few different things in this article.

As mothers, we all have to stand up to make a difference for paid maternity leave. Either through states or the federal government. I hope you’ll join me in that fight and speak with your congressional leaders as often as you can too.

Of course, there is still the tricky situation on when to go on maternity leave << I have a whole post on that.

Birth Classes Don’t Make a Difference

Honestly, in my career someone taking a birth class was the exception.

Most people don’t take birth classes, and I figure their births went alright and maybe birth classes weren’t all that helpful.

Frankly, I also took my own birth class which didn’t really highlight the information I truly needed for a better birth & postpartum recovery, but that’s a post for another day (or watch this Youtube Video to learn more) — so again, my own bias told me maybe they’re not all that important.

But then I started to teach birth classes for my hospital. And then I had patients who had taken my birth class and it was a big eye-opener for me.

• How much they already knew, so they didn’t have to be overwhelmed with information the day-of.
• How much easier it was for them to make choices and not be “bullied” in the hospital
• How much easier they transitioned into life postpartum because they knew what was coming.

And then I started to read the studies on how birth classes effect birth and I was so excited to learn that birth classes:

• Reduces cesarean sections
• Reduces induction rates
• Reduces your need for forceps or vacuums
• Improves birth satisfaction

Which frankly all makes sense. Be sure to read that article if you want more of my thoughts on that.

Many couples worry it’s either too late to prepare or too hard to fit a birth class into an already full schedule—especially when hospital classes are booked out or don’t work with real life. The Online Prenatal Class for Couples is designed for exactly that season: short, practical lessons you can do together, on your time, so you feel prepared, calmer, and confident heading into birth without adding more stress to your plate.

Want to know more about birth classes? — check out these posts:

• Alternatives to Hospital Birth Classes
• How Much Do Birth Classes Cost?
• Best FREE Childbirth Classes
• Why are Birth Classes So Expensive?
• Are Childbirth Classes Covered by Health Insurance? 

Kick Counts are Useless

I believed this for so. long. And, in fact, I didn’t do kick counts until my last baby.

And honestly, the studies on “ten kicks in 2 hours” do show that’s pretty unhelpful as every baby is so different. And, after doing kick counts I am here to say that if it took 2 hours for my babies to give me 10 kicks something was SERIOUSLY wrong and I should have high-tailed it into the hospital for help.

I have a whole article on kick counts (that explains how to do them and goes more into the studies on them) but let me give you the cliff notes (and why this is now a huge soapbox of mine):

• When done correctly, kick counts have been proven to save 1 in 3 still births, that’s 33% of still borns!
• Studies show that it does not increase anxiety but overall increases bonding with your baby
• Often it shows a problem with mom and not baby (but baby shows the effects of the problem) — this can have health benefits for both of you!

Want to know more — check out this video!

And, grab my cheat sheet right here to do them right:

I’m just here to say that a lot of us believe things that aren’t true — and that doesn’t make us bad or dumb. The real measure of a person is if they’re able to change their minds — and expand their thought process to something that might be more true.

So, hopefully these lies of labor helped you realize that maybe some of what you’re thinking isn’t true either. Did any of these change your mind — tell me in the comments!

And I’d love it if you let me hang out with you for the rest of your pregnancy: