How To Build Confidence For Your Birth Experience

Are you wishing that you felt more confident going into your upcoming hospital birth? Today I’m going to share 4 things that you can do, starting today (even if you’re early in pregnancy) to feel more confident in your upcoming birth!

Before we get started, this is the #1 way to feel confident about birth. Don’t miss your chance!

Start Asking Questions at Your Appointments

Maybe you feel confident right NOW at prenatal appointments, or don’t really have questions — but now is the time to start getting confident asking questions. Ones like:

• Is there a brand of prenatal vitamins that you recommend?
• Should I be taking aspirin, why or why not (most important before 20 weeks) — and should I stop before birth?
• I would prefer not to have an IV at birth — is that something you are comfortable with?

The questions can be all sorts, and I really think that once you hit 20 weeks, it’s an awesome time to start talking about things you’re hoping for at your birth. That way they can get to know you better, and you can get to know their communication style.

Build Confidence in Other Situations

As a mom to adult kids, I see how tough communication can be for them.

They’re in SO much pain when they ask someone a question at the store, book an appointment or HEAVEN FORBID have an telephone conversation with someone.

If you find that it’s hard for you to have these types of conversations, I can guarantee it won’t be better once you get into the hospital and you feel extra lost and concerned about your pregnancy.

Have these types of conversations more often. If you can make a phone call instead of an email, try it.

If you’re at a baby store and you’re wondering about a few products, ask the staff.

Build your confidence about learning from others, communicating your needs and them making the choice that’s best for you.

I know this sounds simple, but it’s HUGE in the labor room. Far too often I hear people say they were “pushed” into something, when in reality they were offered something and didn’t know how to get more information to make a choice themselves…

Want to know more hospital tips? — check out these posts:

• How To Have A Natural Hospital Birth
• Hospital Policies You Can NOT Say No To.
• My #1 Tip for Hospital Birth
• How to Time Going to the Hospital in Labor
• When Will the Hospital Admit You For Labor?

Think About Your Options

So many people make a birth plan thinking that’s a “plan” but in reality I think creating a birth plan together just allows you some time to think about options, and what’s important to you about your upcoming birth.

I actually have a series called Birth Plans Made Easy that I think will really help you make yours in the RIGHT way:

You might be wondering what the “wrong” way is…? Good question. I think the wrong way is to think of it as an actual PLAN. I much prefer birth preferences, or hopes…. you’re just thinking what you’d wish if circumstances allow it.

When you’re too tied to that plan, I’ve just seen it go awry….

Often on social media I’ll see people say “they didn’t follow my plan at all” and it’s really just there to help us know what you HOPE for, it’s not “orders” for us and we definitely have discussions with you before following the “plan”.

Things change a LOT during labor, and you have to be willing to be flexible.

Get Prepared

Just like in school, the main way you feel confident is to STUDY.

And, just like in school you need to study ALL of it. So many people think:

“Oh, I don’t need the cesarean part, I’m not having one of those” when in reality — the “test” (aka, labor) is whatever mother nature gives you, not what you’ve prepared for.

Here are a few things I hear a lot:

I am going to my prenatal appointments: Sad news, these are really more to make sure you’re healthy, less to to prepare you for birth. Your provider just doesn’t have the time to really go through it with you, plus make sure you’re healthy.

And honestly, they’re often just not great teachers. You want to take a class from a great teacher!

I’m watching stuff on social media –– not saying that’s bad, but social media makes it REALLY easy to cherry pick what you want to know about. And in case you haven’t heard it before, a LOT of the videos on social media are just WRONG. People had something happen ONCE and then act like that’s how it “always” happens.

I just had a video pop-off that just said most people aren’t bothered by the things everyone freaks out about on social — and I had SO many comments agreeing!

I should also mention that you’re going to spend a TON of time watching social media videos, and still not get totally prepared.

A course puts it all in one spot so you don’t waste your time….

Oh, and what are the chances your partner is watching those same videos? May I just suggest you want a teammate — not just a cheerleader in your corner. Get them prepared with you, and it will pay off BIG.

I only need to learn about pain. Honestly, if pain is your only issue, it’s easily solved in the hospital. Getting prepared to:

• Make choices in labor
• Know what to expect from your body both during birth but also especially during postpartum
• How to take care of yourself after baby

will be huge for you! It’s so easy to forget ourselves, but you matter SO much in this equation, and preparation will pay-off!

It’s too expensive! I agree, many of the birth classes out there are FAR too expensive! Which is why I love sharing this very affordable option. You might even be able to get your insurance to cover it, and you can use your HSA funds to pay for it.

Let me finally say that there is no one who wants you to feel more confident in the labor room than your nurse. She’s there, cheering you on to get the birth you’re hoping for and wants to support you in making the best choices for you at the time.

What are YOU doing to feel confident about your upcoming birth? Tell us in the comments!